![]() ![]() You don't need him to be critical of his mother, but you do need him to support you in how you try to deal with her words and actions. Tell him that you need him to be specifically on your side. You can also explicitly ask him for his support. He may not realise just how upsetting you are finding her comments. ![]() He may be able to let it flow off, while continuing to do his own thing. Given that he grew up with his mother, he may have grown to ignore or accept her criticism. You need to explain what it is like to be criticised and undermined. You need to have a proper conversation with him about the way you feel about his mother's treatment of you. It is important that he stands up for you, or at least stands up beside you. Given that you experience your mother-in-law to be critical and undermining, it is crucial that you feel like your husband is supportive of you. It's like his silence says he agrees with her!ĭavid replies: Reading about your situation I am struck by the fact that you have two potential problems, not just one. My husband refuses to get involved and I feel really unsupported by him. She is really lovely to the children and they adore her. She will also undermine me, even in my own house, and tell the children that it is OK to do something I might have forbidden them to do. For example, the other day she was complaining that I still let my older girl have a soother. ![]() Question: I have two children aged two and three but feel like I am being constantly criticised by my mother-in-law for how I am rearing them. Clinical psychologist David Coleman gives advice on dealing with your mother-in-law and choosing the right time to introduce your new partner to your children. ![]()
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